Imagine lying on a warm, sandy beach. The sun is slowly heating your bare skin. A breeze tickles the hairs along your body. The rhythmic crashing of waves against the sandy shore lets your mind drift into a playful place. Your breathing slows, and you can feel the tiny grains of sand around your feet. A pulsing of energy radiates along your skin. You become aware of every tendril of heat wrapping around your body, every delicate puff of wind, the salt air entering your nose, and how your breath matches the rhythm of breaking waves. Do your senses feel alive?

           Sensuality is often equated with sexuality and all of the taboos, forbidden feelings, and baggage that can come along with it. But sensuality, while it often influences our sexuality, is really just the way our bodies experience the pleasure of the senses. 

           Taste, touch, smell, scent, and sound all affect our bodies in various ways. People experience senses in an array of positive and negative reactions. Learning the way your body experiences pleasure can be very enlightening and empowering.  

           Have you ever been in an intimate situation where you felt uncomfortable, but did not really understand why? Were you unable to make a healthy decision because your thoughts and emotions felt confused and ambiguous? Have you felt continuously dissatisfied with encounters intended for pleasure? None of these inspire confidence. They cause us to second guess ourselves and to feel unclear and sometimes ashamed. If we do not know what it is that brings us pleasure, then we cannot confidently make appropriate decisions. 

           Get to know your body. Learn what foods help your body feel healthy. Try keeping a food journal for a week or two. Make notes about what foods increase your energy or lighten your mood and what foods bog you down. Chart your menstrual cycle and get in touch with how your hormones fluctuate during the month, finding ways to alleviate any unwelcome symptoms. Go for walks in different environments. What feels more rejuvenating, the forest, the beach, or perhaps a busy city street? Turn on inspiring music alone in your living room and let your body move in a variety of ways. Let go of any inhibitions or feelings of embarrassment. There is no one there to watch you. Allow your body to move in ways that feel beautiful and sexy.

           Get tactile with textiles. Pull out your scarves and dresses and tight pants. Let your skin glide along a variety of materials and see what feels stimulating. Rub lotions into your body. Feel your curves, your bumps, your fleshy bits, and your muscles. Explore the way your body likes to be touched and what kinds of caress offer you the most enjoyable sensation. Visit the aromatherapy section of a local health store and take in the smells, noticing what smells inspire you and evoke pleasure. 

           When we tap into our sensuality, we radiate energy and a power that comes from a deep place of acceptance and confidence. To honestly know our bodies is a gift, one we can offer ourselves. So don’t be shy, get playful, and intimate with your body. If you can get a grasp on your sensuality, you will be better equipped to make confident decisions, both in the bedroom and out.